Funny Quotes to Send Your Dad
Looking for the perfect gift for dear old dad this Father's Day? Easy: Tell him a joke! Sure, that may not sound all that generous, but trust us, he's going to love it more than another tie or bottle of cologne. A well-crafted joke—one that you know will make him bust a gut with laughter—isn't just a fleeting distraction from the day. Giving pops a serious case of the giggles is actually good for him!
According to the Mayo Clinic, laughter can stimulate circulation, decrease blood pressure, and actually boost the immune system. So sharing a joke is just another way of saying, "I love you, dad. And I want you to live a long, long time."
To that end, here are 50 jokes, perfect for Father's Day, guaranteed to get a chuckle out of your dad. He'll also be grateful you didn't buy him another striped sweater he didn't even want in the first place.
I guess that's what I get for buying a pure-bread dog.
I was also named "worst employee" at the toy factory.
The kids are taking it pretty badly.
They'd be called cell-fies!
But I was struggling to make hens meet.
It broke my heart. He still doesn't know that my name is Mike!
What an odd way to begin a conversation.
I'm not sure what she's talking about. I opened the fridge door and it's working fine!
He always wanted to be a millionaire too.
"It's state of the art," he said. "It cost me a fortune."
"Awesome. What type is it?" I asked.
"2:30," he said.
Saturday and Sunday. The rest are weakdays!
I asked my 18 siblings, but they didn't have any clue either.
They were cooked in Greece!
At 2:00 a.m., I folded.
I guess the two of us aren't going to work out…
"Envelope."
Attire!
Because he had a ton of sick beets!
I got so excited I wet my plants!
Un-bee-leave-able.
Prism.
These are the Pie-rates of the Caribbean.
I'll let you know.
The news came out of the purple!
"With your eyes," the dad responded.
So now I'm teaching math to mice!
There was a lot of crying and "nobody wants me on their team" and "I haven't got any friends."
Anyway, he was very nice and gave me some good tips on how to be more sociable.
But now it's all water under the fridge.
1.
2.
3.
My thoughts are with his family.
Something bad is going to happen, I can just feel it.
I'll kill him with my bear hands.
Always Tolkien in her sleep…
His dad watches, tears in his eyes, and puts his arm around the mom and says, "That's ar-son."
Philippe Flop.
"But Dad," he said, "your name is Frank."
"I know," I told him. "But I was named after Thomas Jefferson."
Bi-son.
"Age" is clearly a word.
He just couldn't see himself doing it!
Tooth hurt-y.
"She knows how to make bad decisions and is prepared to stick with them."
I don't know, but the flag is a big plus.
When I got home, I told my dog. We laughed and laughed.
B-positive.
She denies it, but I'm sticking to my guns.
I said I wasn't too sure about that… But I could do a wicked "Bohemian Rhapsody!"
Maybe a career as a tour guide was not the right choice.
Depresso.
That's when I realized my whole life is joke.
Me: "I can't. I'm busy working."
Boss: "That's hilarious! Send me another one!"
And for more ways to make pops laugh, show him these 50 Dad Jokes So Bad They're Actually Hilarious!
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Source: https://bestlifeonline.com/fathers-day-jokes/
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